assholes on the bus

today we had to deal with our fair share of assholes on the bus. on a normal day, we I like to focus my attention on the bus "driver" and let the others mind their own business (cuz, hey, i'm a good person). but yesterday, some racial slurs were made a few seats down from tessa and i. these were maddening, but i refuse to share what they said to y'all here (that's how bad they were). the point is, we got all hot and bothered.

now today it was raining and it was fucking hot and courtney was on the bus -- so there were plenty of distractions. yet when i saw his ugly face i couldn't help but to shout at him and his buddies that they were all assholes. this never goes well, and today's test proved that they didn't really give a shit about some big-haired spaz calling them assholes. well, wrong move, buddy.

we were recounting what they had said to courtney, when my hero, tessa, marched back to where the redneck motherfuckers racist people were sitting and started to show them who's boss. it was all going comically well, when that motherfucking bitch "emily" started sharing her point of view. first of all, the bitch wasn't even part of the brawl conversation so she just mind her own fucking business. but no, she's the kind of chick who will rant and rant and rant until your so confused you don't know which ass out of the bunch is the ugliest. she said shit like, "you can't change things in the world" and "it's much more common in the south," and best yet, "they should be able to say the n-word on T.V." of course the bitch wouldn't give us a chance for an appropriate rebuttal and i had to call tessa back so she wouldn't slap da whore.

but then MR. I WEAR THE SAME FUGLY BASEBALL CAP EVERY FUCKING DAY  looked at me (as i was standing up at this point, getting ready to pounce like a cat) and simply said, "asians are the most racist people." i quickly responded with "that's racist right there buddy. stereotypes." and he was like, "no, it's true." and i'm like, "really? where's your proof? is it up your asshole?" and he was like, "i have a friend and he said---" and i was like, "oh really, your friend represents all asian people now does he?" and he was like, "no butbutbut" and i was like, "save it, asshole. you have no fucking idea what you're talking about so you better just stop before i bitchslap every single one of those pimples of your fucking face." of course, this isn't exactly what i said, but i was so into the heat of the battle that at the current moment i don't know what i said.

 if i were to copy courtney i'd write:

dear assholes on the bus, [please note this gets a little explicit...]

   you're all fucking little bitches who are so busy sucking on yo momma's tits (indicating that they're still breastfeeding) that you've clearly forgotten to come up for air. and if you'd stop sucking for a wee little moment, you could come to the conclusion that maybe you should stop repeating whatever the fuck your parents have been ranting amongst themselves (indicating that all of their racial jargin is a clear sign that their superbly influenced by their parents).
  you all are so full of shit even your momma wouldn't fuck you. i can't even begin to wrap my head around all the bullshit you've been spewing because guess what---you're not worth it, and in the words of my idol, "you'll never amount to anything."

fuck you and your inbreeding cousins,
meghan

also:::: liz, please note that tessa is now my hero too, and not just because she got rejected at lunch. she is awesome -- while i'm screaming, "YOU ARE ALL ASSHOLES" she jumps in there with the details. the things that count. the smartiness. it's really cool to see her in action (for lack of a better word).
also liz, if you are not on our side of this debate (meaning you still like alex and the scum he surrounds himself with) we're getting a divorce. i will not stand for you meheer-ing all over them. kapeesh? awesome.


phew...now i can sleep tonight knowing that i've made a difference in the world (ha...ha :(  )