"story of my life"

quick anecdote:

i woke up at 8:30 ON A SATURDAY to start chores. i had just finished my first cup of coffee when i remembered i had to babysit. damn, but when? what was the time i had to babysit at? i looked towards the counter, where a day earlier a paper had laid with the babysit time. unfortunately, no such paper exists at the present. i scrambled around for about... 1 and 1/2 minutes until i realized it was gone forever. 

i sucked it up, and i called the babysittees (well, their parents). 

prior to the actual call, i had rehearsed and written down what exactly i was going to say so that A.) I didn't sound like the fool i always sound like on the phone with people and B.) i didn't sound like an inept babysitter who couldn't handle a piece of paper let alone her offspring. 

the phone call went terribly, starting with the client laughing at the weird sound i made when she said that the kids were "really cute" and ending with me muttering incessant curses to myself as i clicked "end call."

story of my life. 

next:

what i like to call the purebred mixture of Lutheran and Norweigan Guilt, Luthwegian, which resides in my mother's brain, waiting to pounce on the next bored, stupid child who screws up. 

my mother: "so...when did you get home last night?"

me: "ummm... my phone died! i told you that! didn't you get a text from sonia's phone?"

my mother: "no...no i did not...so... well, it would've been nice to know where you were last night...i mean, i know you were safe but...a simple text would have been ok...so...i kept looking at my phone all night...just waiting for a simple text...i kept looking...maybe i didn't see it or i thought it was spam...so... what time did you get home last night? what did you eat?"