can i get real with you guys?

ok.

whenever i'm at home for a long period of time, i become obsessive. as i'm sure i've mentioned, i absolutely hate this aspect of my personality. but i can't help it. i'm easily obsessed with things. and 9 out of 10 times, i completely regret the obsession after some distance and am so utterly embarrassed.

usually i love being home alone for a long time. for instance, i went to bed at 4 AM last night and stayed in bed til 2 PM. i relish that shit. i'm so in love with myself just cuz i get to say that. (insert masturbation joke here...something bout being in love with myself/being in bed for a long time..?) 2 PM guys! WHAT A FUCKING ACCOMPLISHMENT (AND IM NOT BEING SARCASTIC!)

but i don't just lay in my bed, listening to my iPod/sleeping during these times. i also get a little crazy (INSERT MASTUR---NVM). for instance, roxy, when we went to Savers yesterday, that was pretty much the only break i gave myself from not watchin Skins. oh, what? the show i was obsessed with three months ago? yes, that show, beause i'm a pathetic, insane person. but let me tell you more about it, blog, because why half ass the crazy train journey.......

right now, i'm rewatching season 4, with the second generation cast. when i first watched it, i was really into this one relationship between a really hot male and a crazy plus pretty hot female.

 (here they is bein kinda cute an' shit)

they were called freffy, and they had a good run. effy was insane and freddie dies in the end, so it was pretty fucking depressing too. but freddie was soooo hot, guys. and yet... i don't like freffy anymore. they are annoying. i don't know what changed. clarity, though, is what i possess: this time around (please god let it be the last "time around") i'm really into the lesbian couple. whaaa?the lesbians??whaa??? (sarcasm.)

when i first watched it, they were super boring to me. one girl, emily, is this walked-all-over sad person whose twin is evil in the real superficial way. i originally believed that emily was pathetically in love with this feminist chick, whose hair is pretty gross in the third season. so there you have it, that's why i didn't care about them and why i skipped thru their scenes. not because there wasn't a hot guy to ogle during their scenes, but cuz they were boring and one chick had bad hair. OMG I LOVE MYSELF (sarcasm.)

anyway, now i'm obessessed. during their last scene, i cried LIKE A CRACK BABY. it was so cute and amazing. the blonde one  pours her heart out to the red head (they had been fighting for a long time with blondie in the wrong) and they finally make up. idk guys, idk.

 (k, obvs, this is pretty dramatic, but i still think it's less flashy and weird)


call me a sap. call me a crazy feminist who "needs to go to wellesley" (?!) or whatever, but their lesbian relationship is so...genuine. you know how television normally portray lesbians...like constant sexy-time and porno-y...? like marissa during her gay phase in season 3 of the o.c. or like santana and the dumb one on glee. i don't know, i just find it really refreshing. which marks a turning point for me. normally, i fucking love the drama and sexy time (once again looking at the o.c. here). but man, i'm creepy and gonna stop real quick. taking comments off nowwww.