my kind of man awaits here:

;)












no, this post doesn't deserve a title. it wrote its future and it shall forever be known as....untitled

an overall bitchy person: it's like being broken up with over and over again

ok---not gonna lie---today was mostly shitty. i babysat and felt completely depressed and stressed the entire time, but then when it was over i felt like f-ing julia roberts in pretty woman*. not to mention like i was going to cry. couldn't tell you why, but it was like a mini-anxiety attack. then i went to acacia's where videogam-age was occurring and i felt quite literally like a fucking gun should be in my hand [for, the first three hours of babysitting, that's what i watched]. then things got better and it was fun.

now that i've recounted a bunch of intersting stuff for my avid subscribers**, i would like to rant about my dear friend, sonia. what.an.asshole. she's just such an amazing person/friend and she graces me with her presence a ton but then she goes and starts getting all mad at me constantly. recently, we verbally put this out in the open, and she had the nerve to say it's because i've gotten meaner. what the hell? i'm just an overall bitchy person and it stung that she didn't just know/recognize this. it stung hard. like that bee in peiwei. bitchy people have feelings too. and when she's mad at me: it's like being broken up with over and over again. like i know how that feels. anyway, it's just something that's been bugging me and she's gonna read this and hate me more but i'm just saying. you guys know her; how awesome she is. imagine her giving you a look of disgust and then not talking to you for a day -- all the time. it h-h-h-hurtz.


i have a shitload of homework to do tomorrow. a shitload.




*if you don't understand this reference; look it up. you should know this.
** you guys do realize i'm being saracastic when i say shit like that, right? it suddenly occurred to me that it might not translate in writing.

p.s. this was not meant to be a hate-on-sonia rant but rather a please-forgive-me-for-whatever-i-did-now rant. ahem.

story numba 2 plus numba 1's necessary explanation

ok so if it wasn't clear, my table partner was experiencing a hangover. and i thought this was hilarious at the time and laughed out loud. anyway...

story numba 2. clearly, this is going to be about artgirlcrush.

we were all sitting in our seats, in art, when she comes in all hot-and-bothered. she normally comes in like this (late, and with a story to tell her friends, cuz she's that cool), but today she had a story to share with the whole class! naturally, a gigantic grin appeared on my face as i waited for this sure-to-be hilarious tell-all:

girlcrush [she says the whole thing, so i'm not sure why this is here]
ohmygod! i just broke up a fight! these two guys in the hallway were all intense and shit with a huge crowd around them, and i'm like, "waitwaitwaitwaitwaitWAIT!" and i go in between them and put my hands out like this pretends to be pushing the two guys away from each other, and i'm like, "hey now! c'mon guys! we are all on the same team....team USA!. U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! [apparently she started chanting USA and got the crowd to do the same!]



ahhhh, she's awesome. it's really depressing though because acacia and i moved spots so we [i] can't hear what she's saying very well anymore. not that we [i] could hear that well before, but now all i do is stare. at her. which is creepy, and we made eye contact. so i tried to stop. but i heard some where that if you're looking at whoever's talking, you can hear them better. it's also kind of sad, because i've been known  to yell spazzticly, "shut up!!!" to acacia so that i could listen to my crush speak instead. yeppp. i'm really sad. but i want you guys to hear herrrrrrrrrrrr so badly. and now i'm gonna stop typing cuz this blog is getting retarded.

story numba 1

two stories. i feel lame recounting this one, cuz like 89% of you all have heard it before, but for lack of creativity, here we go:

i was in math, squished next to my two table partners, contemplating how long it would take to pluck every hair out of mr. oswald's eyebrow (single). i came up with the answer eternity, when i heard the middle partner (who's got sort of an indie style/look going on, and can pull it off well, unlike some people...) calling out for help. she's looking for an advil she says, and she's desperate. no one has an advil for her, cuz who would possibly have painrelievers on them in math class? oh yeah, i did. i had two ibuprofen in my pocket. not in a baggy. not in a container in my backpack. but just two, individual, little, circular pills. in my pocket. i thought about giving them to her, but then i imagined that we'd have this awkward conversation about why i had them, and if they were real ibuprofen, and why they were warm. so i figured that it was probably best to say, "no, sorry, i don't have an advil."

but then she wouldn't shut up.

she kept asking, and groaning, and grabbing her head. so with an unfamiliar sense of bravery, i said something similar to, "ummmmmm, not to be creepy, but i have these ibuprofen in my pocket...."struggles to get pills out of pocket, spazztically throws them on to the table. to my utter surprise, she said "oh my god you just saved my life!" and downed them, just like that. and then as if to return the favor by making me feel something other than suicidal in math class, she uttered, "ugh. i need to stop going to Thirsty Thurdays."

craaaaaaazy mary

today in art we had this substitute who was totally insane. it was....amazingly cliché.

this might be one of those "you just had to be there" things but here's some of the shit that went down:

- to get our attention she started singing. like folk tunes. in a really high voice.
- she told us our directions in a crappy british accent.
- she walked around during work time and gave acacia and i gum because we were the "creepy quite table."
- she talked to my artgirlcrush's table a lot. i don't know why, but when i passed that table she was showing them a picture of her parents from the '60s?
- she called all the boy-students "little man child"

i didn't know what to think, except that it was really funny and i wish it wouldn't have been weird if i started recording it.

what was even more funny was, after the sub had stopped taking attendance in a british accent (except when she tried to say "acacia?" lol) my artgirlcrush was like, "god! she's exactly like me! ..i wanna be a substitute teacher!!" i don't know why but it was funny.

**what is the correct grammar for writing about someone talking about someone talking? i'm just gonna do double quotations?

then later on for some reason they were talking about "cool parents" and my artgirlcrush was like,

"yeah i want to be one of those parents who's child comes up to them and says, "hey mom can we hang out on friday?" and then i say, "um no i have a date...with your bestfriend."  "

again. may have been one of those "you just had to be there" moments.

nicholas sparks is a satanist.

first, i would like to say that a VERY UNFORTUNATE occurence has taken place: due to my exessive usage of Dell laptops at school, i've started to develop a Windows shortcut habit. IT'S TERRIBLE. instead of doing Apple+C or something, i find myself automatically stretching my pinky to the 'fn' button (on the Mac, but the Control button on a PC) and before i know it, i just fucked up my sentence.

anywhosers. 

i've been reading a lot of Nicholas Sparks' novels lately. and by a lot, i mean i'm working on my third one, the notebook.

they all have shitty dialogue,
they all include ridiculous vocabulary that doesn't fit the characters,
they all have men leaving the women for war,
and oh yeah, they all make you cry (whether internally or externally).

that's where the satist part comes in. he makes you work, like really work, to like the characters; to know them. and then he strings you along as you watch shit go to pieces in usually, one sort-of-but-i-guess-not-really mindblowing second. then he 'tugs at your heartstrings' until you're really depressed and then he ends the book with a second draft-type ending.

he is a "fuckin' satist" who hates hormonal teenage girls, that man.


p.s. Courtney: the last song, you will soon come to notice, includes the word DUNE on EVERYFUCKINGPAGE.


p.p.s. what kind of name is 'Nicholas Sparks'?! it has to be a pseudonym. also. guess what? he's not gay!

religious ref

ok so two very shocking things just happened.

i was en la cocina and i had just microwaved the leftover comida de Indian and had taken all but two bites when my mother, quite literally, grabbed the plate from the table; picked up the fork; said, "oh god this looks delicious!" and proceeded to eat it!

oh. hell. no. 
this is how the rest went down:

Me   What are you DOING?!?!
Jan   Where did you get this?
Me    Where do you think?! I just snuck downstairs late last night, when everyone was asleep, and started cooking some of m--
Jan    Why are you being so crabby?
Me     YOU JUST TOOK MY FOOD!
Jan    DO NOT YELL AT ME, MEGHAN! long AWKWARD pause...And oh, I'm sorry. Sets down the plate.

hmf. you think this woman would've retained some manners from her recent dinner party extravaganza.

then! my father informed me that, for insurance purposes, i would definitely be driving the Tahoe (nicknamed the 'Ho' & the 'Pimp Mobile' by my mother) as my primary vehicle when i got my license. the massive, environmentally UNFRIENDLY, chunky, monsterous, insanely hard to drive piece of shit would be my "primary vehicle!"

i informed him that it was against my religion to even step foot in that thing and that i was committing unforgiveable sins everytime a did, so this whole "primary vehicle" thing would be impossible if i ever wanted to get into a good afterlife.



let's just say, he didn't appreciate that religious reference.

interesting to read

today was quite possibly the longest day i've ever experienced. of those that i can remember. which isn't saying much but let me tell ya, it was very long and very boring.

don't get me wrong, i prefer long and boring days to short and stressful days (stressful=embarrasement=excitement=group activities=activity) but...
...it was so long and boring that i don't have any good anecdotes to write on el blogger. and apparently no synonyms for the words 'long' and 'boring.'

that was interesting to read, right?

...cuz i was on YouTube

cuz i was on YouTube instead of doing anything relatively CRUCIAL for academic success i found these gems under a Community Channel video:

yeah. they wrote those things after seeing this in her description of the video:

"one more thing"

i forgot to write what that chick said in art today:


remember these are moments where i have to bite my lip and turn around, muffling my laughter. unfortunately, by turning around, i turn towards peter and "ben" who return my spastic move with laughter of their own :(

our teacher was talking about a piece of student art where a sickly woman lies on a mountain of pills when 

she mutters to her table: "why is she sickly? She should be the happiest woman in the worlddddd!"

it was a late start today so that's all i got.